


A pleasant surprise

by bettyparker



Category: Marvel
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Post-Civil War, Temporary Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-14 09:33:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5738560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bettyparker/pseuds/bettyparker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve watched Tony die but they were so much more than friends and no one knew it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A pleasant surprise

He still remembers his eyes. Those wonderful eyes that resembled warm chocolate. He doesn’t remember the last time he saw those eyes though. He doesn’t even know how much time has passed since he watched those eyes turn cold hollow and dead. He doesn’t go out anymore. When the alarm sounds he’s Captain America. He saves the day and then gets back to his room. Captain America still exists. He’s not sure how much of Steve Rogers is left. Bucky comes around from time to time. He tells Steve about his missions and how good he is now. Steve never talks to him. Actually Steve doesn’t even move. He only looks over the New York skyline. It unnerves Bucky. Natasha also comes once a week. She doesn’t talk, she just watches him and Steve’s aware that Clint’s hiding in the vent. Steve doesn’t acknowledge them. They’re worried about him. Steve looks more dead than alive these days. There are dark circles around his eyes, his hair lost its shine and he lost weight. Bruce is worried that the serum might not work as I should. They never talk about the elephant in the room. They try to help Steve move on but he never lets them in. They don’t know. They’ll never know who he was to Steve. Every day the hole in his heart grows bigger in his absence. He doesn’t sleep much these days because whenever he sleeps he sees him. He sees him again and in his dreams he’s in Steve’s arms again. He can’t bear waking up to an empty bed. When that happens he wants to sleep and never wake up. He also knows that he has no right to want him back, after all it’s his fault he’s not there anymore. He’s…dead. And it’s all Steve’s fault.

_“The court steps were cold. It used to make him uneasy, the cold. Now he’s just numb. He wants it to end. He waits down on his knees for the pain but there’s nothing. Someone gasps and when Steve looks up he finds chocolate brown staring down at him. There’s blood coming out of Tony’s mouth and that’s all the warning Steve gets before Tony collapses on the ground next to him. Steve breaks the cuffs on his hands and starts pressing on the bullet wounds. There’s blood pooling around them and soon Steve’s hands get soaked in it. Tony’s not in his Iron Man suit. Instead he’s wearing jeans and what used to be a white shirt. It’s red now. Steve feels sick. There’s too much blood, the ambulance sounds too far away. He’s freaking out and then Tony puts his hand on his face. Steve feels the blood on Tony’s fingers, warm and sticky. He makes himself look at Tony’s eyes and not at the blood. Tony smiles a weak pained smile. That smile will haunt Steve forever._

_‘It’s okay, beloved. I deserve this.’ His words are whispered and full of sorrow but at the same time Steve can see that Tony believes them._

_‘No, no, no. It should’ve been me. Please don’t leave me, sweetheart. Please stay.’ Tony shushes him and caresses his face._

_‘I love you, Steve.’ He smiles one more time and then Steve sees his eyes loosing focus. His hand goes limp and the warm eyes turn hollow. Dead._

_‘NO! No, no, no, no. Please come back. Please, Tony, please. I’m so sorry. It should’ve been me. It should’ve been me.’ Steve keeps Tony in a tight embrace, mumbling the words over and over again. The words don’t change anything. Tony’s still dead.”_

The Avengers don’t know what happened between them. Steve knows that they must’ve figured it out but he doesn’t care. He can’t care anymore. He’s just a broken man, missing the most important piece of his life. The war was stupid and Steve regrets it every day. If he would’ve listened Tony would still be here.

Steve hears the door open but he doesn’t turn around to look at who it is. He just wants them to go away. He hears the person step inside and close the door before coming forward until it stops right behind him. Steve just continues to look out of the window.

           “Well don’t look to excited to see me.”

Steve freezes. He knows that voice. He longed to hear it for a long time. But he can’t be here, he’s dead and it’s all Steve’s fault.

            “Yeah I know what you must think. You must think that you’re crazy cause there’s no way that I could be here. But I am. I promise I’m real. I can prove it”

Tony lifts his hand and hovers around Steve’s shoulder. Steve watches his reflexion in the glass and prepares for the moment when the hand won’t be able to touch him and he’ll know for sure that he lost it for good. But that doesn’t happen. Tony places the hand gently but firmly enough on Steve’s shoulder and Steve’s mind goes blank. He doesn’t know what happens but the next moment he finds himself in Tony’s embrace. He’s shaking, crying. Tony rubs circles on his back trying to soothe him and Steve is hit with the scent of Tony. It’s the same, some expensive cologne, coffee and the slightest hint of metal. Steve loves that scent. He grips the front of Tony’s shirt and starts sobbing, afraid that if he lets go he’ll wake up in the same empty bed. He must’ve fallen asleep because the next time he comes around he’s in bed. At first he doesn’t want to open his eyes, cursing himself for dreaming about Tony again, but then Tony’s scent hits him and he realizes that he’s lying on a warm chest. He opens his eyes, suddenly wide awake and when he looks up he sees warm brown eyes staring at him. There’s a smile on Tony’s face and Steve wants to cry because God he missed that smile. Even if a part of him wants to stay there in that moment forever his head is bursting with questions and Tony just chuckles softly before kissing him on the forehead.

              “I can hear the gears turning in your head. Just ask whatever you want to know.”

Steve stares for a few minutes before looking away.

               “How- …I-…You were dead.”

               “Yes, I was. Reed and this guy Doctor Strange brought me back. Don’t ask me how I still can’t understand all the details. All I know is that I died and then I woke up in Reeds lab. They also gave me Extremis. Before the war I finished the formula and I gave it to Reed to keep it safe. He said he wanted to make sure that I won’t die again.”

Steve listened carefully. He heard of Reed Richards and his weird friendship with Tony but he never heard of Doctor Strange. Frankly he didn’t even care. He had Tony back. He was here with Steve, alive and well.

               “Well enough about me. I heard you didn’t leave this room aside missions. I also heard you didn’t want to talk to Barnes or anyone as a matter of fact. Why is that?”

               “I couldn’t. You died and…some part of me died that day too. Captain America I could be but I didn’t know how to be Steve Rogers anymore. I just wanted them to leave me alone. You died because of me and-“

               “Steven Grant Rogers, you listen to me right now. It. Was. Not. Your. Fault. No one was to blame for that. I made the choice to save you because I love you and because between you and me I will always choose you. That day was not your fault. We all played our part, we made our choices okay? Listen beloved, let’s not dwell on the past, we can’t do anything about it. Tomorrow we’ll talk all you want, okay? For now just get some sleep cause I heard you haven’t been sleeping lately.”

                “I couldn’t sleep. I would always dream about you and when I’d wake up you’d be gone and I’d remember how much I lost.”

                “It’s okay, beloved. I’m here now, you can sleep. I’ll still be here in the morning. Sleep. We’ll be okay.”

 

Next morning when Steve woke up and he found Tony sleeping soundly next to him he believed what Tony said. They will be okay. Tony’s back and he’s here next to him and nothing will ever hurt him again.

                 “I love you, Tony.” Tony doesn’t stir but Steve isn’t bothered. He has all the time in the world to tell him.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I watched the trailer too many times. Hope you guys like it. (Yeah i know i suck at summaries)


End file.
